
The topic we're going to look at this morning is Christian Living: as a Man. One of the greatest attacks in our society over the last few decades has been going on deals with man and his role, whether it be in society, in the church, in the family, or whatever the case might be. Part of this has been because we've tolerated this kind of speech from media outlets of various kinds for years.
But also, we've shown it in some of our examples within the family and within the church. We've demonstrated some of these things and brought the problems to ourselves.
It is time for us to train our boys to be men, for our young men to be bolder, and for our older men to stay the course in their service to God as long as it's physically and mentally possible for them to do so.
- 1 John 2:14
Christian Living: as a Man, we're going to break this up into three separate areas.
Christian Living: As a Single Man
First of all, we're going to talk about Christian living as a single man, because there are certain things about living for Christ as someone who is not married, someone who has no ties necessarily to someone else other than themselves.
That gives them certain freedoms in service to God. But first of all, we need to recognize that there are differences in the way that God sees the single man and the ways that the world sees the single man We need to remember and focus on this idea that a single man needs to be serving and pleasing God, is their number one priority, but we're going to look at how they're portrayed in the world's view.
We're going to look at this from the perspective of an acrostic, using the word, PLEASE.
The world says men are to please themselves. And so they live in such a way that pleases themselves.
Secular World View:
- Pursue gratification
- Lucrative career
- Education
- Answers to know-one!
- Sow wild oats!
- Elevates self over others
We're painting, at the moment, with a rather broad brush. But that's generally how the world views single men, at least in our society today. But what is God's view concerning what a single man ought to be?
God’s View:
- 1 Corinthians 7:32
It is that you as a single man are supposed to be dedicating your time and energy and your life to the service of God. Why? Because you have no other responsibilities but yourself. You have no one that you're taking care of other than yourself. You have the time, you have, you should have the energy and the dedication to put God first.
- Service to God takes Priority!
- Know Your Role!
Men, we need to know our role when it comes to working in the church.
"But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of every woman is the man, and the head of Christ is God."— 1 Corinthians 11:3
There are certain divisions that are given to us by God, where men are supposed to take the lead and they are supposed to be the leaders. Two of those organizations, one is in the home and the other one is in the church. The church mirrors the home. Men are called to be leaders. Our young men need to be leaders in our churches and our congregations. But to do that, they need to prepare and practice to be those leaders.
- Prepare and Practice!
Prepare and Practice to Lead Singing
One of the saddest things that I saw growing up, as I traveled around various parts of the country, visiting and attending various congregations, was a lack of appreciation for old-fashioned congregational singing. And learning how, as a young individual, to lead and direct an auditorium full of people who want to sing a song.
It was something that we were taught to do when I was growing up. But it's something that I have witnessed not being taught. And you know what? I've heard from young people and even people my age, sometimes even older people concerning singing in the church, it's kind of boring, maybe we should do something to liven up our singing because our singing is boring. No, we need to train our men on how to sing, how to lead singing, and how to be directors of singing to a group of people. And when we do that, when we know how to do that, our singing will not be boring. Now, remember, we're still painting with a broad brush. I'm not speaking specifically about the singing here in this location.
Teaching the importance of song selection and the basics of how to be a song leader, something that we should get back to. We don't have to be a world-class singing director or musicians to accomplish that.
Prepare and Practice Teaching Bible Classes
What about teaching Bible classes and preparing lessons? You know, at a congregational level, we need to develop our younger men into teachers. That's how that's going to work. It's going to be those who are older, those who are seasoned, those who are more experienced in that environment, teaching our single men how to be instructors. How to be teachers. and how to accomplish that mission.
- 2 Timothy 2:24
We look at that word apt to teach in the letter to Timothy, and it may be like, oh that applies to elders, we're not in that book, that's 1st Timothy chapter 3 where he's talking to elders. They need to be apt to teach.
Yes, here, he's talking about to whom? He's talking about the servant of the Lord. And for this lesson, that's you, single men. You single men, you servants of the Lord, must not strive, but do good to all, be apt to teach. It doesn't matter if you ever become a full-time preacher, go to a preacher's training school of some kind, and take that on as a career. But there will always be a need for sound Bible class teachers in our congregations. We need to make sure that we're up to that particular task.
Pitfalls to Avoid:
But there are some pitfalls that single men need to avoid. You see, there's a line that gets walked somewhat closely on the world versus Christ, and how close to the line do you get? How close to the line can you get and still be pleasing to God? My friends, it's not about how close to the line can we get.
Walking a fine line!
- 2 Timothy 2:22
- 1 Peter :11
Abstain means to not participate in, to not go in that direction. Don't go in the direction of fleshly lusts or youthful lusts that war against the soul.
- 1 John 2:15-17
Be Steadfast:
- 1 John 2:13-14
If it wasn't possible for us to do what was right, John wouldn't have congratulated those that he wrote to who were young men. Now probably not all of these are single, but we're going to use it in a singular sense. They've overcome the world. Why? Because they were strong towards God. They were faithful in the things that they were doing. They were being steadfast.
- 1 Corinthians 15:58
There is a work for young single men, Christians, who are single in the church. It's not necessarily restricted to age. There are some that I know of who are in their 60s now who've never been married. There's work for them in the church too.
Christian living: as a married man
One of the saddest things to see in the world is society's view toward one who is married. And to illustrate that, we're going to look at, just for a moment, an article that I found. And the title of that article is, Dumbing Down Dad.
“Where did we fathers go wrong? We spend twice as much time with our kids as we did two decades ago, but on television we’re oblivious, troubled, deranged, and generally incompetent. Even if dad has a good job, like the star of ‘Home Improvement,’ at home he’s forever making messes that must be straightened out by Mom.” — Sarah Peterson, 2013
We've progressed in the wrong direction since then, since that time. You see, according to the world, when a single man decides he's going to get married, his life is over. All the fun is gone out of that man's life because he's getting ready to be married.
"Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord." — Proverbs 18:22
Is that while a man's joy is not supposed to change one whip, whether he's single or married in the sight of God or towards God. His joy is not supposed to change, but his priorities must change a little bit.
Your joy should not change but your priorities must!
- 1 Corinthians 7:33
This doesn't mean that he has an excuse to not fulfill his obligation to God. Paul is saying, you now have someone you're supposed to take care of, be responsible for. You may not be able to do things for God as freely as you did before, you have a wife to take care of. But, you're responsibilities toward God are not over.
Now this does not mean, by the way, that he now has an excuse or reason to not fulfill his obligation to God because he's married. No, that's not the case at all. Man's asked to help, No, I can't do that. I'm married. No, I can't do that either. I'd love to help you out, but no, I'm married. I can't do that. I gotta make sure she's happy. That's not what Paul is saying. Paul is saying, you now have someone to trust, you're supposed to take care of. You now have someone that you're supposed to be responsible for. You may not be able to give all your time, talents, and energy as you did when you were single to God and His service. You may not be able to pick up and, and go on a two or three-week mission trip with a group of folks. You have a wife at home you've got to take care of.
- Acts 18:26
What's happening in this chapter? Well, these two individuals that Paul has a great fondness for, he worked with them for a time. They were tentmakers. They met up and they worked diligently together. These two heard a very eloquent message from an individual, his name was Apollos. But the problem was Apollos was speaking an outdated message of God. He was speaking John's message of repentance for the kingdom of heaven is at hand. And these two, who were faithful together in the Lord, taught him the way of God more perfectly.
- Romans 16:3
Paul, asks the Roman congregation there to greet Priscilla and Aquila and he calls them my helpers in Christ. Men, married men, your work is not over because you are married.
There is still work for you to do, but also recognize that providing for your family is service to God. So provide. Be the providers that God wants you to be.
Christian Living as a Married Man Means You Love Your Wife
Christian living as a man means that men are to love their wives.
- Ephesians 5:25-29
- 1 Peter 3:7,12
What does that mean? What do these passages mean? Well, it very simply means that loving your wife is a command of God, and it is something that we ought to do.
So here's my question. Here's my challenge to you men that are married. This morning. Are you willing to compare the love that you have for your spouse to the love that Jesus has for the church? That's what Paul calls us to do.
- Ephesians 5:22-31
We talk about marriage because that's what Paul talks about there. But when you get to the end of the chapter, he says, I'm talking about Christ in the church.
Which of those covenants came first? Was it marriage or the church? Marriage. In the book of Genesis when God created Adam and Eve. The church is mirrored by the relationship of the husband and the wife. But Jesus gave his life for the church. Are we willing to do the same?
If we're not able to give honor to the wife, our wives, as Peter suggests, then our soul is in jeopardy. These aren't just things that make for a happy home, they make for a relationship that's either right or it's not right with God.
Christian Living Means...You are Faithful to Your Wife
But Christian living as a married man means that we will be faithful, to our wives also. Unfortunately, we live in a world where infidelity in the marriage relationship is expected.
You know, there was a comedian many decades ago, who had this particular part in his skit where he was talking about women and he mentions that you can't trust a woman. Cause she'll kiss her husband goodbye at the front door and then she'll walk to the back door and kiss another man good morning. Well, that's not the way that we're supposed to live. And we don't say those things to be demeaning toward anybody. That was, that was a comic routine. And there was this one man in particular that said, Amen! He said, there's a man that's been working both doors. That's not right. That's not the way that we're supposed to be.
That's not the way families are portrayed in the Word of God.
- Proverbs 6:32
- 1 Corinthians 7:2
God is taking care of this situation early on and has given means for appropriate levels of sexual intercourse. Argue this with me for a moment. If, based on these two passages, God instructed men to marry to avoid the sin of fornication, and if the sexual union of a husband and wife is honorable in the sight of God, which according to Hebrews chapter 13 and verse 4, it is, and God will judge those that are whoremongers and adulterers, then why, men, do we allow ourselves to be swept away, as the Proverbs writer and the psalmist would say, by strange women knowing what the consequences are? I don't understand.
These are things that the world is supposed to be known for. But, unfortunately, you and I are fully aware of these individuals, who are Christians who have fallen down that same trap themselves.
Leave and Cleave!
We need to make sure that we are not following right along behind them. we are commanded to, leave and cleave.
- Matthew 19:4-6
It goes right along with what we were talking about in our adult Bible class this morning, the idea of doing things the way God said to do them because, without God, man's going to mess it up. And that's exactly right. If we try and do this thing called marriage without God being the number one focal point in marriage, then we as mankind are going to mess it up. And God doesn't want us to do that.
The Greatest Blessing and Scariest Responsibility is Being a Father!
Finally; Christian living, as a father. There's no greater blessing or scarier responsibility, than being a father. And if you don't know, try it sometime. It's great. It's wonderful. But let me point this out just because you've fathered offspring doesn't make you a father. There are plenty of sperm donors out in the world that I would not classify as fathers.
Having Offspring Doesn't Make you a Father!
- No Sleep
- Heart Break
- Providing
- Joy of Growth
It's Time for Men to be Fathers!
But we, as fathers, need to take an active role in the rearing of our children. We cannot, the Bible does not authorize us as men, as those who are supposed to be fathers to take a hands-off approach to the raising of children.
Fathers will be Active in Raising Children
- Ephesians 6:4
- Proverbs 1:8
- Proverbs 6:20
- Proverbs 23:22
You see, it is possible that we men who are fathers could be failing our children. It's not something that we want to think about. It's one of those things that could cause us to have sleepless nights outside of what our children are doing. But it is possible that far too many men who should be fathers are failing their children. You see, there are those households where it was the father saying, I make the rules, you'll do things my way. And then he goes off and does his own thing and leaves the wife to make sure all of his desires are fulfilled in the raising of the children. That's not the way that it's supposed to be.
Here's a reality. Most children in the church, but I would argue in any religious organization, most children will see their mother reading and studying from the Bible more than they see their father reading and studying from the Bible, regardless of how much the fathers read and study the Bible. It's just the reality of the way things are in most places. Often when our children learn about the Bible, it is from their mothers.
Yet many times we as fathers will wonder why we lose our young people to the world. As fathers, we don't understand why the home gets weaker and weaker. And many times as fathers, we don't know why the church is growing old and not being attended by younger generations.
Maybe you're a member of the body of Christ and some of the things that we've talked about are a little bit troublesome. I want you to know, and I say this from the heart, there's not a sermon that I will ever preach that is classified as an angry sermon. It may sound that way and may have a big voice from time to time, = but everything is spoken out of love, and hopefully spoken directly from the word of God.
It is time in our churches, now I'm going to speak to this one, if we want to grow, and we say that we do, we have plans for growth in the near future and beyond. If we want to grow, then it's time for our families to come together and grow. Then the church will grow because our families are growing, not in size. We're not worried about size. We're worried about growing in Christ.
Maybe you're not a member of the body of Christ. Having heard the word, are you willing to believe it? This wasn't necessarily a lesson on how to become a child of God. If you want that, come back tonight. We'll talk about that this evening, specifically.
But God's invitation is present for each of us at any time. Having heard the word, are you willing to believe it? Are you willing to repent of your sins, walk in the ways of the world no more, and walk in the ways of God? Confess the name of Jesus before this group of people. And continue confessing Him as you walk through the rest of your life. That way He can confess you before our Father, who is in Heaven when this life is over, and be baptized to have your sins washed away. If we can assist you in any way, please contact us.